What I talk about when I talk about "Catching Up"

My blog is called "catching up". I thought it was a cute running pun that also conveys the sense of being on a journey.

But after some introspection I realized, it actually means a lot more than that, more than I could have known back then.

And I'm still learning.

So, what do I mean when I talk about "catching up"?

Am I trying to catch up to other runners?
Well, no, that's silly. Let's say I knew a gal with a half marathon PR of, I don't know, 1:42, and a marathon PR of 3:45. And let's say I took up training with the intention of beating those times. Ha! I'll show her, right?!? Well, even if I succeed....what exactly have I accomplished? Okay, so I beat some arbitrary times. Whoo hoo. In the meantime, I embarked on a running journey that meant absolutely nothing to me and my life. What a waste! It's impossible to "catch up" to someone else because their journey is their own.

Am I trying to catch up on my health and fitness?
Certainly, this is part of it. I can't think of a single runner who doesn't count the health and wellness benefits among their reasons for running. I joined a gym at the beginning of 2013 and got two free personal trainer sessions when I started. In my first session, my trainer asked me (as part of a routine set of questions) at what point in my life was I in the best physical shape. He told me that most people say high school. That has stuck with me ever since. High school?!? That seems wrong, on so many levels. I am an active, vital, healthy person and I don't want high school to be the best shape I was in for the rest of my life!

Am I trying to catch up to finally having a certain race under my belt?
Sort of, but not really. This whole journey started when I decided to train for a half-marathon, and then changed when I decided I wanted to do a full marathon as well. But if I define catching up as being able to say I have this or that race on my belt, where does it end? I may have accomplished a half marathon, but then I'd have to catch up to a full. And once I tackle a full, well, I've still never qualified for Boston. And if I do qualify for Boston, I still haven't done an ultramarathon. And once I've done an ultramarathon I haven't done an Ironman. And once I've done an Ironman, I haven't made any Olympic teams. I think you get the idea. No matter how much I accomplish, there's always going to be something I have not done. Running isn't just about races. There are many devoted runners who don't race, and they still have something they are constantly trying to catch up to in their own journeys.

Am I trying to catch up to certain times?
I think this makes sense as a good goal to have, but I don't think it holistically defines why I'm running and what my journey is about. Plus, my goal times are always changing based on the progress I made and, sometimes, just based on what kind of mood I'm in at the moment, so that makes it kind of hard to "catch up" to them.

But, that does lead me into what I really do mean by "catching up". Back when I started this blog, it was called "Anti-Runner Aims for the Half". I called it as such because when I started this journey, I didn't like running yet. I wasn't running because I loved running, but rather, because I had something to prove to myself and I wanted the satisfaction of setting out and achieving a concrete goal.

But after a while, I did begin to love running. So the blog had to change, and that's when it became catching up. At the time, I chose that title because it was a fun play on words and because, in some way, it did encapsulate what I was up to even if I couldn't articulate it at the time. I was trying to catch up, and I have been ever since. I've been trying to catch up to me. With every step of this journey, I've realized that I'm capable of so much more than I expected of myself. Each good training run and successful race show me that I can do more. And I want to do more. I sold myself short in the beginning, and now I'm trying to catch up to the person I know I can be. I feel like I need to catch up for all those years I dismissed running and exercise and didn't get to improve myself the way running is improving me now.

And I guess, in an ideal world, I'll never truly feel caught up. May your reach always exceed your grasp, as they say. I'll always want to do better and reach higher - and I should. But that's okay. Because, as they also say: the journey IS the destination.

The beginning: the Color Run/Walk (haha) in July, my first 5k

The latest: placing in the top 10 in my age group in TWO 10Ks. The highlights of my running journey...so far!!